knock knock , who there ray, ray who , ray winstone , I am your daddy you'll get your perks.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It can never be certain, as chickens are incapable of communicating.

Why did the gecko cross the road.... Because he saw great deals on car insurance!!!

varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

What is worse than reading an anti-joke relatively similar to the other? Walking in your front yard and realizing a zombie is eating your dead grandmother.

Erica is so sexy i want to hump her

Why did the tissue dance? Because it had a boggie

Where was Sally when the bomb went off? Everywhere...

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What did Jesus say last before being nailed to the cross? I don't know, It never happened. ...Why did he say that? He didn't, it's not real.

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

Your Mom is so poor she can't afford home-owners insurance.

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Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

Why couldn't the Canadian taste the maple syrup? Because someone cut off his tongue. -BLLJ

a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

How do you make sushi if you are a fish? Commit suicide and sell yourelf to a sushi resturant!

What happens when you throw a green stone into the red sea? It gets wet.

Yo mamas so fat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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