Why did the chicken cross the road? 24

Your mom is intimately familiar with many mens' penis due to her many years as a successful urologist.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain. Chuck promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbi "why the long face?" The rabbi says "to get to the other side." Seeing the puzzled look on the bartender's face, the priest says, "orange you glad he didn't say banana?"

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's a women. Why can't Stephen Hawking speak freely with his voice? Because he's autistic.

A man walks into a bar. He is genetically predisposed to alcoholism, and it's destroying his family.

Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

What's green and has wheels? PAIN!!! I lied about the green and the wheels.

What's the best thing about 27 year old's? There are 20 of them.

Jim and Dave walk into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll it be?" Dave is black.

(Put joke here)

Your mama's so poor, that it's hard for her to pay her bills.

An Irishman walks into a bar. He orders whiskey. An American enters the same bar. He orders a beer. A blonde Frenchwoman enters the same bar. She says "Gimme whatever the Irisman ordered! Double it! He's cool!" She started talking to the American

Chuck Norris doesn't answer the phone - he doesn't have one at the moment

How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

Why did 0 dislike 1? Because 1 made 0 feel like he was nothing

Hi? No!!!!!

How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

A man walks up to a gay guy and says "you are socially accepted"

A gay man came out 5 years ago, he also has not heard his farts since... He lost his ears in a boating accident that same year

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Wanna hear a dead baby joke? Of course you don't. they're sick and disgusting and enjoyment of one merits only the deepest of society's hatred and scorn.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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