Hi my name is Jim

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Why was it true for sure? It was on wikipedia.

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since when?

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Why did the world not end in 2012? Because the Mayans were drunks.

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A politician from the National Country Party keeps interjecting - "I'm a country member, i'm a country member' "yes we remember" says Gough whitlam

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Ipod to earbuds: "hey buds" earbuds response: "sup player"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

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A man walked into a Persian dentist office. After a few hours he leaves the office with his mouth feeling much better because the oral-surgery went exeptionally well.

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What did the man with five penises say? I have 5 penises.

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Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

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What is faster than a black guy stealing a TV? His brother with a DVR

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roses are red , violets are blue , sugar is sweet and so are you. the roses are wilting the violets are dead. the sugar bowl is empty and so is your head

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Why did 12 people die when they went to see The Dark Knight Rises movie premiere? Because they were shot and bled profusely resulting in quick, painful death.

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What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

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What did your mom say when Quinn Griffith Randel walked in the door? Hi.

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What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

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Two blonds are driving to Disneyland. While there driving they see a sign "Disneyland: left" So they started crying and headed back home.

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How do you make a ninja fly a plane? You put a gun to his head and say fly this plane.

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What happened when the Neo-Nazi ran into a group of black people? He listened to their struggles, heard their stories, accepted their diversity and eventually hung up his hateful ways.

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Whats the difference between a cat and a dog? Nothing a cat and a dog is an extremely different species.

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A blonde and a brunette both starred in a TV show.. It was called Beavis and Butthead.

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Your social life.

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You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops