CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

Q: What's worse than a black guy with a gun? A: the holocaust

There are two muffins in the oven. The first says to the other, "Its getting hot in here." The second, befuddled, replies, "AHH! A talking muffin!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

Two men were patients at a mental institution. One was named Dave, the other named John. Dave very quietly said, "Hello, my name is Dave, and I have a violent form of phonophobia, so please do not-" "DICK!" Dave promptly strangled John. John had Tourettes Syndrome.

what do you call a pie in a roll a roll and pie

Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

Whats green and fluffy? Your mom.

SEX

Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

Why did the Hispanic man have drugs in his pocket? He had just gone to the pharmacy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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