Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

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A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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What do you call a black man? Rob

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What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

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What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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I am a dwarf and im digging a hole... lol jokes dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist

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You're so sweet I have diabetes

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

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A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

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Black people having a Job.

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what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

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What do you call a dog with no legs? What ever you want, its still not going to come.

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What is 1 + 1 equal to? 2, because if you have one orange and if you add another orange, you will have 2 oranges, therefore 1 plus 1 is 2.

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What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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