How did the chicken cross the road? Chickens live in farms, they don't cross roads.

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What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, sauce on apples.

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anti jokes

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There are 263 birds on a fence, a farmer shot 1 how many are left? 0 the rest flew away.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Wanna hear a joke? Obamacare.

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knock knock WUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!!!! WUUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!! WUUUUUZZZZUU......

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Knock knock Who's there? Rick Rick who? Your wife's boss. I regret to inform you that your wife has sustained a injury on the job and she is in intensive care... I also regret to inform you that your insurance doesn't cover the injury

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if she is old enough to bleed, she probably wears tampons.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

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Roses are red hulk is green, I'd smash that ass, If you know what I mean !

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How big is kevins Dick? Idk ask his mom!

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Hey look! Where? Above you, get the rebound.

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What do you call 10,000 black men with their heads sticking out of the ground? Afro-turf

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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As for regarding the Win/Win/Win/sore ass kid comment below... Why not? There is too much Win in order to worry about some fucking soreass thats just gonna grow up to be a slut... RIGHT? Your friendly r*pist Neighborhood r*pist Moral: Man: "He or she who knows I am right, will be be the only one left" Btw, I am the Anti-God, what else can I be? You are the ones that killed Christ Ahahahahahaha! Political humor bonus because my satisfaction of owning you all and your entire screen. Are you Right Winged? Or wrong Winged?

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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what do you call a black man being hung from a tree? -prejudice

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what's faster than an asian on a bicylce on payday? many things

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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Whats the difference between an elephant and a tomato. You put tomatos in a salad.

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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Where is my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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