MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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