"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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