Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

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Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

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Guess what I was with your mom last night so I wraped her in foil and put her in the oven.

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What are the similarities between aaron ash and a cow? they both have 7 stomachs.

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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A man is taking a shower in jail where he drops the soap. He proceeds to pick the soap up and cleans the rest of his body, puts his orange jumpsuit on and returns to his cell.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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Jhon is riding his wheelchair, but can't get up the driveway. Lucky a stranger passes by. Jhon: Can you help me please sir? Stranger: No

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Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

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What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

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I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

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I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Why didn't the vampire go to the Garlic festival? Because it sucks.

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Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by jimmy savile.

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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whats worse then being a jew now? being a jew in 1942

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he looked behind him and saw a pedophile penis in his ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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