What do you get when Johnson cooks toast? Shit toast.

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Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

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Why didn't the vampire go to the Garlic festival? Because it sucks.

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Whats worse than falling off a bike? rape.

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A black child gives away his piece of fried chicken. He is allergic, and eats some watermelon instead.

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What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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If this becomes top-viewed I will post more milk related jokes

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Why did Sheryl Go to the Bathroom? Cause she had Direha...........

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What's slower than mollasses? Your fattass mother!

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Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

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I'm 23, just like most people my age.

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why did Suzy play jump rope with the neighbors kids? She had no legs!

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roses are red violets are blue wendy williams looks like a man roses are red violets are blue i coach penn state pull down your pants

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Whats 1+1? The answer!

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A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

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What did the monk say to the 1 legged, Asian prostitute Nothing, Monks take a vow of silence.

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Why did Susan fall off the swing? -Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan.

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why am I who i am, and you are who you are? dick spice

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Faces like yours belong in the Zoo. Don't be mad I will be there too. Not in the gate but laughing at you.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

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Knock Knock DAMMIT WOMAN MAKE ME A SAMMACH

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Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfectly straight line? It is impossible for humans to draw perfect lines.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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