Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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Why didn't John get a present for Christmas? Because John died eight months ago.

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Why didn't the little girl show up for school? Because she was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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A blonde, a Jew, and a black man all went to the store. They each bought their groceries and went home to enjoy the rest of their day with their families.

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roses are red poo is poo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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