whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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a man was shot.... he died

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why do woman love the twilight books? i have no idea woman can't read

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What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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what's worse than the holocaust? when starbucks puts whip cream in my hot chocolate and I didn't ask for it. created by KA

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How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

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Why did the blind man laugh at the book. He didn't

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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roses are red violets are blue i have aids and so do you happy valentines day!

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

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noah is a scrub jungle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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