How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

the lemon was sweet.

who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

Why can't Heller Keller drive? Because she was blind.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

Aiming with a revolver? That`s fucking overrated. with a heavy powerful revolver such as this one, you do not necessarily need to aim that well at the heart of your enemy in order to blow his brains out.

Women deserve equal rights.

what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

Knock knock come in.

What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

Stephen Hawking

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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