Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? The Holocaust

What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 was a sixoffender!

what do asians do in asian history month, nothing, it does not exist, hahaha

What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

A man walks into an airport. He is sexually taken advantage of by TSA employees and suffers from severe depression for years after, eventually becoming gay and divorcing his wife. He then goes on a quest to discover the name of the man who took advantage of him. Once found, the man kills the employee and his family, commits acts of necrophilia upon his corpse in a slightly erotic display of revenge and stalks airports for the rest of his life, fruitlessly attempting to quench an insatiable bloodthirst for TSA workers.

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

Why did the dog cross the road? Because the pizza man saw how hungry he was and left a pizza for the dog. So when the dog saw the pizza he went to go get the pizza, because he was hungry. In hindsight the moral of the story is: if you ever see a hungry dog on the other side of the road, become a pizza man (if you aren't already) and give him a pizza.

A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

What color was the black guy's skin? Brown

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

How many people buried in a cemetery are dead? All of them.

Why did your ears get blasted with sound? You never turned the volume down..

What did tyler say to Jake? My pussy is wet jew

How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

What do you call 100 black men at the bottom of the ocean? A scuba group because during these hot summer months they like to cool off and go scuba diving.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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