An irish man walks into a bar... Hes met with an intervention of family and friends who are all very concerned about his drinking problem and well being.

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What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

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the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

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What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

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Why was Little Billy sad? Because he got shot.

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The man that loved birds so much that he played golf just to get a birdie.

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What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

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One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

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What did the astronaunt say to the doctor? Hola!

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

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What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

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ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

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Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

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A black man, a jewish man and a white man walk into a bar. The black man shoots the bartender, the white man takes the money and the jewish man holds the customers hostage.

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women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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