What did Helen Keller say after the Iron Maiden show? Nothing, she is a mute.

Why wasn't the old woman sitting on the porch? Because she got raped by a big scorpian.

a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

The homeless man first experience warmth....in Hell

How many gay men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. He was happy to do it.

What's the difference between Jew and a bread? Bread does not scream when you put him in oven.

I saw 2 cannibals eating a clown. What did I do? Called the local police.

no pun intended

Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

Whats Stupider than john? Nothing.. he's certifiably retarded

My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

Why was the number 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't.

What's clear and wet?? Water (I think)

what's black, white, and red all over? a penguin stuck in a blending machine

Sixty... eight

why does it suck to be a black jew you get the back of the oven

A blind man and his dog walk into a store, the man lifts up the dog and begins to spin around. When questioned about his activity the man replies, "I'm just looking around"

Wife says to husband, who works is programmer, "Honey get out of bed there is a bug in the bed". Husband says "ok."

BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

Q: What did the priest say to the small child. A: Rite?

If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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