poop nuff said

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

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What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

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kieran scott has a huge back

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

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What did the woman say to her rapist? I've had better.

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"We all miss somebody a lot every now and then, its only human! But never give up, just keep reloading and firing until you hit that somebody!" Moral: Moral, answer me, MORAL MOOOOORAAAAAAAAL! DUN DU DURUN, DUN DUN DUN! *gunshot* (The moral section just because I love them red thumbs ^^)

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I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

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You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

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A girlfriend told her boyfriend it soaked all the way through. She screwed up their art project.

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Q: what is blue and floats in a pool? A: a baby Q: what is purple and at the bottom of the pool? A: the baby 5 minutes later

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What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

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What do you call a muslim in an airplane? Whatever his name may be, though you could, of course, choose not to address him, though if it were a two-seater plane, it would be good manners to exchange polite conversation.

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What did the mime say to the girl? .......

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What animal has four legs and one hand? Happy rottweiler

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

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What did the man at the haberdashery say? Six and seven-eighths, bub, six and seven-eighths.

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EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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kevin kim

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Why was the jewish boy sad? He had no friends.

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there once was a man from Nantucket. He was a fisherman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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