Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

Why can't Hellen Keller read, write, or do anything really? Because, shes a woman.

two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

- Why Mexicans have small steering wheels in their cars? - Because of this they are able to drive a car in handcuffs.

Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

Why did the black guy eat KFC? Cause he was hungry.

You see how lame this is?

What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an ax.

Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

How do you make a plumber cry? Tell him that Luigi beat him to the princess

Why did the irishman go to the bar? because he was a designated driver and was picking up his friend.

boy: you want to hear something funny? girl: what? boy: women's rights girl: you want to hear something trivial? boy: what? girl: your penis

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What do homeless people get at Christmas? Cold.

Why did the farmer's wife leave the farm? Because she was a lesbian.

What battle did Napoleon die in? His last one.

Why was Shane cool... Because he was a cool bean.

What happen when you put a Ciara and a Charlie together? They have sex.

A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. A heated religious debate ensues in which everyone is uncomfortable and leaves questioning their own faith and fearing the unknown.

Man: Want to hear an anti joke? Woman: ok Man: Why did the the girl fall off her bike? Woman: I don't know. Man: She got hit by a refrigerator. Woman: ok

My life is a dream in of itself.. inception???

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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