(approach girl) How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to fit into the same dress as you

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A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

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What happens when a black man falls out of a tree? He gets hurt.

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69

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FUCK THE CHRISTIANS

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Leaves are green, You should know all this by now...

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Knock Knock. Whose there. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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Yd the chicken cross the road? To SAVE THE WORLD

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What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

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What's black, brown and red? My dog as a serial killer

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Why do women why perfume and make up? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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why did the bus crash the driver was an alcoholic and was drunk he killed 8 people upon impact.

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how do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? with a blender. how do you get them back out of the bowl? with tortila chips.

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i heard something so funny it made me crap my pants you were a mistake

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what do you call an arse bandit? lady gaga's tanning salon attendants 3rd cousins dog chauffeur, roberto

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the grass is always greener on the other side.

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Why did the kid get out of school at twelve? He left early with a stomach ache

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your girlfriend is so dumb she is clinically retareded

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A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital due to a large aneurysm that has burst in his brain because he walked into the bar.

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I have a black guy on my family tree. He's my cousin.

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guys cmon dont make fun about abbie make fun of josh brown WHAT A NOOB

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Why did the Jew rob the bank? -He was a criminal.

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I'll be back. Please use the door.

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If a little boy teleported to mars how fast would he get there? Little boys are incapable of breaking down their molecular structure in order to send their individual particles faster than the speed of light in any given direction. Thus this question is illogical and can not be answered.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops