What's the difference between a black man and a monkey? Millions of years of evolution

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sixty....eight.

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pubic lice.

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Why couldn't the black man get home? His car broke down, and Goodyear was closed.

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Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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What did the man who was punched in the throat say to his friend?

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Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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A preposition is a bad thing to end a sentence with.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

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Lets make like trees and stand still

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whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

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A man walks into a bar, he then falls unconscious and driven safely to the hospital.

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Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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Whats worse than than Holocaust.? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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Q) Why did Anti-joke start this webpage? A) Probably to make people laugh. and to show some irony in a few common jokes.

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No...........

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Lol you are really adorable, is more like maybe we will ask you some time, but hey, if you are asking, I mean you are beautiful, insecure, easy to break... I am totally joking by the way, you are completely down to earth, you are sweet, you know what you want, etc etc, hey, and to know what you want in life you got to be confident. Wait a second... I "act" like a savage? Lawl, "streams of OceANUS catchphrase"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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