A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

What long black and tasty? Licorice

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

what did the cat say to the potato? meow

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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