Why didn't john go to school? He has terminal cancer and he must stay at hospital

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Your family is so fat that when their feet hit the ground, it recorded 9 on the richter scale, because they were launched at the Earth at close to the speed of light, and when you account for relativistic mass effects, the amount of energy that was displaced into the ground was tremendous

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The day after Christmas a chain-smoker, a sex addict, and an alcoholic go to the doctor. The doctor tells the three friends that they need to quit their addiction or they will die. R.I.P. Tommy, Jacob, and Winston 1/1/2011

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why did the man die? Because he was robbing a bank and police used lethal weapons By- the duck

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one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

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whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Well it depends how many of them can figure out the staircase.

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Did you hear about the human cannonball who lost his job? Circus attendance is on the decline, as people are spending less money on entertainment, due to a slow economy and poor consumer confidence. Because the circus owners paid him under the table, he did not qualify for unemployment and was force to take a job at Hardies. He has a drinking problem and suffers from depression.

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charlie sheen becomes sober.

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What happens when you agree to disagree? You extend the duration of the argument.

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Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

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why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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Q:a black man walks down the street with alot of light whats happaning he A:is it the parade of light

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I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

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Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

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So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

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lol

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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Penis

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

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What did the German say to the Rabbi? Hello. The German was also Jewish

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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