A women's opinion.

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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Five men walk into a bar. The bartender says, more taste or less? None of them care.

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Why was Osama Bin Laden killed? Because he couldn't dodge all the bullets in time

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Q. How do you get a black man out of a tree? A. You get a ladder and help him down

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A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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How many watermelons did the black man have? Too many to count, he was a farmer and his primary crop was watermelons.

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Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

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Yo mama is so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

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What do you call a stupid anti-joke? Stupid.

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Want to hear the best joke ever? Want to hear it again?

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Why do blondes where pigtails? Because they look nice.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

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It was a dark night, I was walking home from the shops in town, The wind was whistling through my damp hair, My spine tingled and i tucked my hands under my stinking pits. I felt like someone was watching me, I walked faster the breath was warm on my kneck i turned around. It was gary glitter he pulled down my pants and gave me the best sucky i ever had. We kissed and i tasted the cheese from my knob. In all garry glitter has a giant knob

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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Womens Rights.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could DO YO MOMM!!!

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What happened when a Blonde girl and a Ginger man have sex without a condom? The woman gets pregnant and then after about nine months the woman gives birth and the child grows up, when the child is adolescent it is able to reproduce and the process continues again.

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What is Oedipus' favorite tv show! How I Met Your Mother

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Why can't a blonde woman drive? because she was shot in both legs and cannot operate the pedals without extreme pain.

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar with a vase of 12 roses. 57 years later he died after a lengthy battle with colon cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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