What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

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Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

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Do you know the Muffin Man? Of course you don't, faggot.

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A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

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roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

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What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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boobs

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How do you kill a black guy With a gun

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Who can jump higher than a mountain? Everyone, mountains are incapapable of jumping.

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See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The wind. The wind who? ...

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How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

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What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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A moose walks into a corner store and asks the lady where the Mashed potatoes are. The lady working behind the corner says "Down Aisle five..." The moose goes down aisle five and there are no Mashed Potatoes. -Tyler the Creator

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Shortest Joke in the World? Well, just look down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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