Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the cow say to the bull. they had kids because they shared an interest in being silent.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the wife not in the kitchen? The husband's gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Are women better than men? Dont know but what we do know is they swing at bigger balls (softballs), shoot from lower basketball nets, do pushups from their knees. Shall I go on?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Roses are red Violets are blue Last night I came home to find my entire family murdered....

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

thumb_up thumb_down -142

Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

thumb_up thumb_down -192

Knock knock. Who's there? Ostrich. Ostrich who? No no I don't have a formal name, I'm just telling you I'm an ostrich.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops