a man walks into a bar..... OWW!!!!!!

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So you're walking through the desert and the wheels fall off your canoe, how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 13 because baseballs can't have babies

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What did the working mother get her son for Christmas? Empty promises.

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there are three dudes one is white, one is mexican, one is black so a wizard says wish of something you want to be and jump off the roof. so the white guy wishes to be and eagle and jumps off and is an eagle the mexican wishes to be an owl and jumps off an becomes an owl then the black guy wishes he had to shit and jumps off and falls to the ground cause he turns into shit.

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A man walks into a bra, he is an alcoholic and is destroying his family

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so an american, a Hispanic, and a Indian walk into a bar in Washington D.C, and the bartender says to the american "I'm sorry, but u have to leave.

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what does a black car sound like when it starts? RUN-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA -GRANT PARK ALL THE WAY

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What's worse than falling off your bike? Getting hit by a truck.

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What do you do when there is a truck on the interstate? Nothing.

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Roses and red, Violets are blue, This type of poem, Must always rhyme.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see.

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What's really ugly and smells like a hampster? My hampster.

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ok i'm typing, so how does this work?

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There's a blonde, Brunette and a Redhead stuck at the top of a cliff. A genie appears and says he will grant them each one wish. The Brunette wishes she could at the bottom of the cliff, The redhead wishes she could be back with her children and the blonde would just love to be back to her family. :/

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and the Jews? Harry Potter can escape the chambers.

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Q: What did one blind girl ask the other? A: Where are you?

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Q)Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the toilet? A)Because the P is silent.

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The Pope walks into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll ya have, Pope?" But the Pope's grasp of English is tenuous at best, so he mumbles something in Latin. The bartender doesn't know any Latin. The Pope gets frustrated and leaves.

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? No, the impact of the colliding objects being the tree and the ground causes a disturbance in the silence thus causing a sound. The tree gets too much credit.

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Kid walks into principals office Principal: do you know why I called you down here. Kid: yeah, I punched a kid at lunch. Principal: that's not why I called you down here

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The NHL playoffs

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Your mom is so stupid, she decided to go back to school.

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How do you survive a plane crash?? You don't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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