Why did the baby cross the road? His parents were drug addicts, and didn't pay him any attention.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Hello

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What starts with P and ends in O-R-N? Popcorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

dfghfgdfhfdhfgdfghdfh

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many people with ADD does it take to...Oh look! Shiny!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, Dick in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Justin Beiber and a speaker = no hearing within a 25 mile area

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road? Having lost his job, wife, and general sanity, he resorted to suicide by car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. I didn't ask him.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Sarah Palin is President

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Games stop telling me to press any key to continue. That key doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 recently got out of prison for violent rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why did the math teacher cry during 6th period? He was held at gunpoint.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

thumb_up thumb_down -43

A man walks into a bar. Jeremy Lin congratulates him for being a person.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What is this a book??!!! What am I supposed to do...... READ IT?????!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +62

What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

thumb_up thumb_down +60

GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

223

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops