Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

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No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

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What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

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Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

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What did the lion say to the octopus? Nothing, lions can't talk, and even if they did the chances of a lion and octopus meeting are very slim.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

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This is a humorous joke, you will laugh.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

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Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

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What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

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Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

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How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

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Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not a very good poet

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There was a man who had a camel, but one day he lost his camel. He wanted to go and look for it but he couldnt because he had to go to work. So the next morning he went to look for his camel. He went over the road and saw a gate, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate and saw a forest, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest and saw a hill,but he couldnt go down the hill because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill and saw a river,but he couldnt go over the river because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river and saw a house, but he couldnt go to the house because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house and saw a door, but he couldnt knock on the door because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, and saw a man, but he couldnt speak to the man because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", but the man couldnt respond because he had to go to work The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", and the man said, "no"

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why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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What do you call a black man who graduated med school? A doctor

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Why was the man so unhappy. he died

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I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers have no feelings.

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balls in ya mouf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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