Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

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How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

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Why are anti jokes so repetitive? Because you're reading too many, get off your computer.

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What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

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A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

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What do you say to a womam with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops