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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

A man walks into a bar. A few hours later he walks out.

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

If the Earth is square, why are trees smart? because you touch yourself at night

Why did the person name her OC telephone? I have no idea, please let me know why.

What happens when you put a baby, a dog and a cat in the same bag They will all most likely suffocate if left in the bag too long

What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

What did the father give to his daughter? AIDS.

An Asian with a big dick.

If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

Penis

Why did Jimmy drop his Ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

Uhh, yeah, some of it, I mean people never looked me in the eyes on the buss really, I dunno,if you think I am pretty maybe it is just your opinion or something, but thanks, you are hones and its nice. Never been out drinking, I am you know, kinda nerdy, I just prefer hanging out with friends at home.

why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

roses are red violets are blue

Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

What do you call a muslim with a gun I dont know his name

knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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