Why couldn't the little boy open his bedroom door? He was dead.

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

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Why did the boy play Xbox? Because its a quality source of entertainment

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What is Lady Gaga's real name? Who the crap knows?

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What does an otter and a pencil sharpener have in common? They both feature in this joke

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What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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If life gives you lemons, you are probably suffering from hallucinations.

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Sloths

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

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Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

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Why is an Orange, Orange??? Because its not blue!

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if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

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I scream, you scream, we all scream because we're getting murdered.

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My three children are three big mistakes.

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what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

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A priest sneeks in to a pre-school and is arrested shortly after for tresspassing.

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What do you say to a blind man in a sunglasses store? Nothing. Why do you feel the need to bother strangers while you needlessly shop at your local merchandise outlet?

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What do the angels say when god sneezes? Chuck bless you

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Why shouldn't I go out today? Well I haven't done any work today. Actually no. It's not that. I'd have to ask my guardian Sally to bring out the wheelchair, and well, I'm afraid of her. She beats me. My hobbies are playing football, watching Loose Women and looking at pictures of Gary Barlow on Google Images.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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What do you call a whale driving a plane? A horibble massacre.

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800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

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A blind man walks into a bar. It was a book shop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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