Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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Knock Knock Who's There ........................ ........................................... I hate doorbell ditchers

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Before her maiden voyage, they told the Titanic she could become anything. So she became a submarine.

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Why did George shaw fall off the swin?. Because he got a bowl thrown at his head

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What has 4 legs and doesn't move? A child born in Chernobyl.

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What do tomatoes, apples, oranges, lemons, and peaches have in common? They are all fruits.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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How come Helen Keller couldn't drive? Because cars were not invented back then.

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Why did it take so long to find Osama Bin Laden? No idea. Bad military tactics. Was he found?

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Roses are red My bulb is blue My pants are extending When I look at you

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What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

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it's weird how Jesus came out of the cave on the same day as Easter

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feminists.

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Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

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Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

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What looks like poo but is rainbow colored? Rainbow colored poo.

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Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

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What is the difference between a fridge? I'm sorry, I have a severe mental disability and telling jokes is not... F'tang F'tang Zoop Pong Wii!

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why did the black guy cross the street? to get to the package store.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops