A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

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Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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America Votes

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I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

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knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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Whats the differnce betwwen a Wheelbarrow and a sack of dead babies The wheelbarrow is not in my garage

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer.

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Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

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What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

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Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

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Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

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Why did the chickecross the roe? Because I was bein chased by an angry group o mobsters that 8 years ago were busted by the chicken when he was still working for NYPD and found them all in an ally and busted them for later discovered tax evasion and then 2 years later they found a way ou of prison and tracked down the chicken for 6 years until they found him in road island 4509 lake side estates and then proceeded to chase him onto and across a road that was near by to his lake side apartment and then they go tire and we. Back to their HQ in NY and then the leader of the gang went home and in a depression fuels rage mersiouy beat his wife then went up stairs and threw his 9 year old son out the window and hanged himself. The chicken also died because 8 years is at the top of their lifespan.

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops