Why does Bugs Bunny have big ears? Because he's a rabbit

You want to know how I got these scars? A horrible knife throwing accident.

Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

if it walks like a duck and looks like a duck your probably looking at a goose

Why didnt timmy go to the party Mom said no

Yo mama so fat when she looked at the scale it said to be continued

What happens when you light a truck full of babies on fire and drive it off a cliff filled with lava and set off explosives when they land? The babies die. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and due to genetics could not see well without the help of glasses.

What do you call a purple chicken eating a bicycle? A purple chicken eating a bicycle

It's gone. It's all gone. There's nothing left.

Fine, this better be worth it, this is no time to be a jackass Nero.

whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

Who is gay and sits next to me in my architecture class? The same Griffin Kid.

Nero? As In Nero7? Septimus? Where you not killed during the raid? I read you got tortured and killed by your own out of mercy.

Jesus Christ dude. Wait, aren't you Jewish?

Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

why did the chicken cross the road? because his mother was dieing of terminal cancer in the hospital across the street where the bar was. he was drinking because he is an alcoholic.

Q: Whats black and hangs from a tree???? A: A tire!!!!!!!!!!!

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

Why is ms Wolfe mean? Because she is a poop face

Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

on a scale from a banana to a pound coin - how much do you like the works of antonio vivaldi?

JOHN to MARY: Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet So are you MARY to JOHN: Roses are red Violets are blue Who are you? JOHN to MARY: Roses are red I'm your husband MARY to JOHN: No! JOHN to MARY: WHAT??? MARY to JOHN: Ex Awkward silence. Mary moves out the next day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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