What did the elderly lady say to the man? You still have not repaid my services

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How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her she is a burnette.

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FOOL TOP COMMENT IS MINE!

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FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

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two tomatos walked over the road and..... just kidding tomatos can't walk.

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knock knock whose there? suck my a s s barf

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Who are doctors and literally are porn stars

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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who let the dogs out my mom because they're fat and need exercise

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Why did Justin Bieber bieber his bieber? Because Bieber biebers his bieber when his bieber need a bieber bieber. BIEBER

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How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

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Soooo... a black man walked into a bar and asked the bartender for a beer.

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How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, no mutual friends, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!?!?

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Your mom is so stupid she has to get homeschooled for college!

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Lard and Liz lard,lard and Liz

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What did the black man do when his car was rear-ended? He exchanged insurance information with the other driver.

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whats better than sex with a 12 year old?? nothing

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How do you scare a Jew Hold your lighter up and blow out the flame and I've toward him real slowly and see how much drama he'll cause

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A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Why don't carrot tops souls ? They just don't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops