A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did Sarah limp to school? Because she got hit by a tree

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What time is it when a cow walks into your house? The time that your mother arives.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a dead black person? A corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a black man on steroids? Strong.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

how many boys does it take to use 4 computers? 4.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the black guy not tip his pizza driver? Because he didn't order pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Two Jews walk into a concentration camp. One goes to work and the other one gets gassed.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why wasn't the black man allowed on the golf course? Because a wealthy business man had rented out the entire course for a very important international investor.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do gay cows eat? Grass.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Where did the little boy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I heard you like getting dirty, so I got a dump truck to dump dirt on your bed so you can get dirty while you get dirty.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

"Knock knock." "No."

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How did superman always save the day? Because he was a fictional tv actor so he could do whatever he wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? Well, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

(SPOILER ALERT) The following are a few punchlines: "I didn't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck!" "I can't believe I just blew thirty bucks!" "Hold on buddy, I'm about to save you $10,000" "To get to the other side!" "Because 7, 8, 9!" "She had no arms!" "A fridge!" "I don't have Ferrari in my garage!" "The clown can stay, but the Ferengi in the gorilla suit has to go!" "And if it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college!" "It was stapled to the chicken!" "I proved it to him." "The holocaust" "Red paint" "A stick." "I wished for a big orange head." "No." "A bicycle is an object and a black man is a human being." "A pilot." "The papa tomato steps on him and says ketchup." "You left your engine running!" "That's what she said." "TV watches you!" "I think so Brain, but where will we get that many cucumbers at this time of night?" "Rectum? Damn near killed him!" "One but it takes two episodes and the bald guy dies."

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Farmers are outstanding in their fields

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing they're rocks? What did the tree say to the other tree? Nothing they're both trees? What did the pillow say to the other pillow? Nothing they're both pillows? What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man walked into a bar. That must have really hurt him.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops