Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

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Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I got ran over

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?". The horse doesn't respond because it neither speaks nor understands English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on the way.

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What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

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Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

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When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

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How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

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A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

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Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

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How many hamburgers can a grizzly bear eat? Maybe 6.

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I have no soul so I must consume yours

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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when ever i finish a sentence say im a man Me :i met a girl You:im a man Me: i invited her to my place You: im a man Me: we sleept together You:im a man Me:she wisperd in my ear You: im a man

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Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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