What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Q: what did the tractor say when helost his farmer? A: wheres my farmer?

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what sucks? things that suck

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing. Hitler died many years ago now and he was in no position of power during Bin Laden's reign of terror due to the fact that he was already dead. Therefore it is impossible that they could have had any sort of conversation. But now Bin Laden is dead as well. HIGH FIVE!!!!!!!

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

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a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

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What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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what would be worse then 9/11 and the holocaust? -if the twin towers fell on a concentration camp

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What is Justin Beiber's favorite pastime? According to his biography, it's reading science fiction novels

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops