What did Darth Vader say when he spilled his drink? Darth Vader is a fictional character and is not a part of humanity.

What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

Yo mama is so fat!

Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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