How do you fit 4 homosexuals onto a barstool? You make the barstool wider allowing for all the men to sit more comfortably on top of the stool.

What do you get when you cross a canary and a lawnmower? Nothing. A canary is a small bird, and a lawnmower is an inanimate object. Any procreation of this sort would likely produce no offspring.

Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Tell her something that doesn't make any sense at all.

Your mom.

You cant like my stuff ive known you for like 1 day. just kidding you can like whatever you want, actually ive know you for 5 years

Knock knock Who's there? Doorbell repairman

Whats worse than finding a spider in your shower? Getting repeatedly stabbed in the dick by a rapid chipmunk.

What did the gay guy get at the grocery store? A tub of Häagen-Dazs ice cream because he thought he deserved a treat.

Two black men go inside a movie theater. They sit down and watch the movie.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

What did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Take this and put it- No.

69

what do you get if you eat cream cake, coffee cake, strawberry cake, chocolate cake, fruit cake, and sponge cake? a very large stomach-cake.

what do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh

what do you call a joke that is not a joke? not a joke

Directions- I would be lost without you. Thank you for always being there for me.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

How do you treat people that cannot say no in just two seconds? (redux and spellchecked) Treatment: Hi...: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! SAY IT MUAHAHAHA! People: NO PLEASE I CANT! NOOOOOO! *door unlocks* Problem solved, NEXT!

why did the little boy drop his icecream? he was hit by a train

Yo momma so fat, she has hypertension, diabetes, and a higher risk of heart disease.

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

In Soviet Russia, the political system was very different than it is today.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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