Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Baseball

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Q: how do you spell apple without any letters? A: you can't.

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What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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Why did the boy kill himself? Because he wanted to.

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

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roses are black violets are black your going to die with hate and sorrow

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bunge cord? My ass!

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CHEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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What do you do when a girl you gave roofies to wakes up? Take your tongue out of her ass and run!

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what did one bum way to the other? we're shit out of luck

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What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

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Jack Oliver has a Bowl.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Three men walked into a metal pole

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What's the difference between people with aids and people with cancer? People with cancer can get into heaven

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms.

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Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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