Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

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Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

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what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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whats worse than having cancer? nothing you have cancer and should proceed to see doctor

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make me a sandwich!

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How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

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Cole is "good" at soccer

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What do you call ten black men running down the street? A race.

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Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

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Baman: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? Piderman: What? Baman: They're all gone!

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops