Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

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The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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What do you call a blonde on the Moon? That depends on what her name is.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

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An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

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whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

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Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

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Why did the black man rob a KFC? He was in a very difficult financial situation and was worried his kids would go homeless. After scouting various locations he found the security at a nearby KFC was non-existent.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue And you will be too when i'm done with ya

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Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

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A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

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Joe Paterno dosn't walk into a police station.-South Park

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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