what do you get if you eat cream cake, coffee cake, strawberry cake, chocolate cake, fruit cake, and sponge cake? a very large stomach-cake.

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What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

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Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

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Roses are red. So is bacon, Poetry is hard . bacon.

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? When a child gets raped every night by its father.

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Why are the new york knicks called the new york knicks.? no one gives a crap

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why did the US nuke japan besause sending chuck norris would be to cruel

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Several occupants leave as they realise the danger of the large animal.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

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You wanna hear a funny joke? Sorry, but I'm really not a funny guy. Not a comedian, you know.

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How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

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what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

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What's the difference between slavery and the Holocaust? Slavery happened.

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What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

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What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

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what do you do when mrs curaba gets heated through a fridge at her so she can cool down

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

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how many licks does it take to get too the tootsie center of a tootsie pop. Well it depends on how you eat it, there is always the option of biting it, so there is no defined answer, as well as ones lick might absorb more of the lollipop then another mans.

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the koala.

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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