What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

a woman votes!

What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

The ability to live the life of a dead person.

George Bush.

a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "you sir are gay!" The gay man says, "I take offense to that!" The bartender then replies "how may I help you."

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

...IIITS... :) SMILEY :( AND MADDY THE HORSEHEAD SHOW ITS :) SMILEY :( AND MADDY THE HORSEHEAD SHOW! :) YAY! :(SHADDAP YUUU! Episode one... The waiting for the wait!

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

Q why did the kids make fun of timmy A because he was an android with al chunk of metal added accidentally where a real boys crotch would be. Bwilkster

how to you kill an Irish midget? You don't as murder is illegal and discriminating against a certain type of person is racist.

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a room? This is impossible as dead babies are incapable of achieving such a feat.

What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

GONNA

there is nothing better than waking up to realise that your being hugged by your partner unless that partner is not home

So, this guy walks into the doctor's and says: "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor says: "Yes, you've shattered both your kneecaps. You'll never walk again."

Why did all the boys come to my yard? Because of My milkshakes

Q: When do you know you've had to much to drink? A: When the zebra in your belly button starts talking to you

One day I was walking in the forest when I saw a squirrel get hit by a van. It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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