How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

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What do you call an Irish man with no legs? Handicapped

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Bitch please, you're adopted as well.

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What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

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What does the scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!

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Roses are red. My name is dave. This poem makes no sense. Microwave.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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Why was patrick sad? he was raped then murdered then super raped

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What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

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I see said the blind man to his def wife as the dog with no legs ran over

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off and his body was never recovered. Repeat then handled the funeral planning.

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what did the jew say when the arab threw rocks at him? He didnt, the israeli air force proceeded to fire white phosphorous missiles and annihalated many small children and babies in the process, the aftermath is still around today.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Chikin nuggets are cooler than your mom!!!!!!!

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I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

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Two Guys walk into a bar; the second one should have seen it coming.

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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YOU

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four little monkeys jumping on the bed... one fell of and bumped his head... mama called the doctor and the doctor said... im calling child protection services.

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[Insert dumb, last minute anti-joke here]

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What worse than the holocaust? Danny's.

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A black man and a white woman cross paths while walking on the sidewalk. After greeting each other, they continue on their way. Each goes on to enjoy their respective day free of racism and sexism.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i cant ryme or spell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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