yo mamas so fat... she's a map on call of duty

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, due to the lack of details, there could be many reasons, such as the possibility that there was a cornfield on the other side, he got scared by a loud noise behind him and ran across the street, or just plain old curiosity, but whatever it may be, right now, we do not know the cause.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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the WNBA

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Yo momma is so fat that we are incredibly concerned for her health.

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A man hits a woman while driving. Whose fault is it? The mas. He was out drinking that night and shouldn't have gotten in his car in the first place.

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What do you call a really small grape? A grape.

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what is fat, sweaty, and italian? Italians

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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what do you call a fish with no eyes fsh

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*prepares this to get negged*

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What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

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What happens when you murder someone? The Government murders you.

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What is better than a cat? Nothing

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When I'm sad I cut myself... another slice of cheesecake.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

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Davey Peterson.

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What happened the the blonde that went swimming? She cooled off and enjoyed a hot summer day.

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Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

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who steals more than a black person?, a pirate.

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Helen got hit by a bus. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Helen!!

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why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

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What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops