Whats the worst part of having a Birthday on Feb. 29th? You only get facebook birthday wishes every 4 years.

Why did the dog kill the fish? He had no reason, he just wanted fish. What, you thought he had like, a vendetta? pssh your crazy

Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

what do trees and humans have in common? they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

Roses are red Violets are red Oh sh*t the gardens on fire

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Q:what do you call a black man in a wheel chair? A: a war veteran who accidentally stepped on a land mine while trying to protect his country.

what do you call a starfish living 500 miles under the sea? A starfish.

What do you call a feline attempting surgery? A catastrophe, because they aren't very good surgeons.

Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

when i start seeing A TON of black people what does that mean? im color blind

So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

Sure, I like all kinds of Juice. -Apple Jews -Grape Jews -Orange Jews The list goes on,,,

mc hammers income.

Your mother is a very respectable woman.

Knock Knock! Come in.

what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

There is a black guy, British guy, and a Spanish guy in a room. Wait that'll never happen, black people hate Spanish people.

poop

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.. unless you're color blind...

A guy walks into a bar... Ouch

What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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