- Anti Joke

I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

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why are you people on anti-joke? BECAUSE you have NO LIFE !

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple??? You... Lol jk no there could be alot of things like getting raped, the holocaust, me killing your children i mean someone killing your children. Because if it was me you would know it was me and file a report and i would be arrested and be sent to jail. And in jail i would try my hardest to stay alive brcause if i died that would suck. I would also try not to drop the soap beacuse i might get rapped by some prisib mate, also the floors are quite dirty and that would guve me any type of bacteirial infection like the stupid yeats infection or maby the persob who takes it from me when i finnish would get aids cause it dropped on the floor and who knows were it was. Then he would die from aids and his wife and or kids would be sad and set up a funeral were a preist would stand in akward silence cause the guy murderd the preists father so he wouldnt be mean an ruin the funeral but he wouldnt say anything nice. But after the funeral the preist would go back home and smoke a cigarette because he has started an unhealthy habbit just like millions of people around the world. When will people learn that it kills you faster than cancer well some cancers are quite quick and painless like a head tumor. But most tumors are able to be saved because the doctors are smart these days coming from yale or havord universitys and what not. Most peopel want to take the easy way out by just working at kinkos or wallmart. Both jobs are shit wich is why im probably going to go there cause no one else will except me in there offices or departments. I think its the fact i look like a pedofile trying to kill babys but you know how life is short and difficult to control but you have one life why waste it. Stupid emo kids trying to cut emselfs and shoot themselfs so they dont have to deal with theirs or their partners periods because the other day coming back from mc donalds this guy almost hit me with his car and threw a cup at me for some strange reason but hey not my problem unless he was my first victim?...... Lol jk i have never killed anyone and im not that creapy... Awks POTATO!!!

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "I should've voted Democrat!"

roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

A: What do you call a Jew with only one arm on Christmas? B: An amputee.

Q: What is wrong on many different levels? A: Rape on an elevator.

That's not what she said.

Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

(insert command here) Oh yeah, well I want world peace.

Wanna know a funny word? Pickle-weasel.

What did the mother get her blonde daughter for her birthday? A flower on her tombstone.

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo Boo hoo? Boo hoo your parents are dead.

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Ching Chong Chinaman is sitting on a wall. People make fun of his name because it is so unusual.

Why did the chicken eat fried chicken? Because fried chicken is so good! Kelvin Yang.

What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

What do you call 12 black doctors in a dark room? 12 black doctors in a dark room.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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