Why did the chicken cross the road. Because, It can't fly

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it with an axe.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had come upon them and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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"I like my women like I like my spare tires, in the trunk of my car." -Paul Alangadan

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Girls

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Q: What did Gaddafi get for Christmas? A: Brain Surgery

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Whats the diffrence between a boy scout and a Jew? The boy scout comes back from camp.

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What's worse than shoveling dead babies??? Using a pitchfork...

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What did the blind guy say when he walked past a fish store? Something smells fishy

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My great grandfather died in the holocaust. He fell off the guard tower.

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A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

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What happens when a llama falls off a cliff? It dies.

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What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My penis whilst im doing it.

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Who was the first person Steven Hawking runs up to when he finds out something new about science? He is in a wheelchair due to a condition called ASL, therefore he cannot "run"

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How do you make a wall a darker shade of red? You throw the baby harder.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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How do you kill chuck norris? With a gun...from 40 feet away

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WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

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Why was the boy praying? Because both of his parents had just been brutally murdered in front of him and he was analy defiled by the assailant and left alive to have live with the pain of seeing both of his parents be killed. He had also dropped his lollipop.

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Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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Q: Do you know what Lady Gaga make for his birthday? A: A party

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this guy didnt get any pussy last night so go easy on him I I I V

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poop is very very yummy.

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When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops