If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

What did the bungee jumper say to his wife? Honey, I'm going bungee jumping today.

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To eat it of course

Anti-Joke Memes? That Shouldn't Be A Thing

I don't do cocaine I just like the smell

How do you stop a black guy from drowning? You take your foot off of his face

Why did the penguin die? due to an increase in the quantity of greenhouse gases that are being released into the atmosphere, global warming is on the rise. So the penguin died because his home melted.

A man is writing with a #2 pencil. He looks down and sees that it says "Made in China." He shrugs and continues writing

Republicans

How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

What do a black person and a monkey have in common? A. They both are organism that need food and water to survive.

Why couldn't the girl throw the baseball over the fence? She had no arms.

Why did the boy drowned Bc he couldn't swim

you know what they say about men with big feet... damn you got some big feet.

a man walks into a bar he is promtly escorted out due to the fact that he wanted to kill the bars owner. The man got life in prison with no chance of parole. This mans name was Michael Myers.

roses are red violets are blue shut the fuck up or ill fuck you

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Knock Knock Who's there Nobody is here. This is just a feeble attempt of your subconsious to convince yourself you have someone who cares about you in the least bit to mask the horrible wretched pain of loneliness and suffering that is the enternal damnation of your life.

Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

Why did the fat man hit the ground before the skinny man? Because he jumped first.

the meaning of life is too burn calories so I burnt a fat kid?

How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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